Citizens of Campania, hear a man who was once promised a throne and is now promised nothing but bandwidth.
The Principality of Maydovia is not lost. It is TEMPORARILY EMBARRASSED, and temporary embarrassment, properly leveraged, is simply an early-stage valuation. I am pleased to announce the third pre-sale round of MAYCOIN, sovereign currency of a nation that exists in every sense except the one your maps insist on. Ground floor. Founder pricing. A seat at the table when the table is repossessed -- sorry, RESTORED.
General Yevgeny Mosk continues, as ever, to insist my letterhead is forged. I remind him, as I remind you all, that a forged letterhead is still a letterhead, and he has never once produced a real one of his own.
At least I have a plant. What do they have?
Invest with dignity. Invest with MAYCOIN.
Now I am a man with a laptop and a dream. That dream is you.